Why I don't use baby food

Someone asked me the other day why I don't use baby food. I forgot my coherent answer and gave dumb answers at the time! But here are the real reasons.

1. Kids are fickle and you don't know what they are going to like. So I only buy food that I like. I have a grocery budget, you know! My kids eat what I eat and if they don't like it, then I can eat it. No wasted food.

2. I super hate spoon-feeding. No, I SUPER HATE SPOON-FEEDING. I super hate it, guys. For real. I can nurse and eat at the same time, but I can't spoon-feed another person and eat at the same time. It is easier for me to just let my kid nurse at dinner and eat, rather than go hungry while they are spoon-fed.

3. I really hate food messes. My family can back this up. From the time I was less than a year old, I ate with silverware and never made a mess with my food. To this day I can eat tacos and other messy foods with basically no mess on my plate. I just hate food messes. Mushy baby food is inherently messy, and therefore I inherently abhor it. Just the thought of mushy food smearing on anything makes my little heart cringe. I don't care if other people's kids have messy food or something, but for mine... I'd rather just avoid that.

So, how do I feed my babies?

They get food that I like that is easy to dissolve--graham crackers, cheerios, etc. Sometimes, yes, I will chew up food for them and give it to them neatly. Mess-free. Plus adult saliva helps break down the food for the baby. I know it sounds gross but biologically it's actually a smart way to introduce your kids to adult foods.

Basically, it comes down to: I am lazy and I hate food messes and I hate cleaning up food messes. Also I hate spending money on food that I won't eat if no one else will eat it. I spent money on baby food for Nathaniel but regretted it. Now I just avoid that whole thing. It's not a philosophical issue and there is no judgment in my heart for people who use baby food. For me, I'm just too lazy for that! Haha!

curing fungal infections with essential oils

My little baby had a horrible rash in her skin folds: her neck skin, and the little folds of her baby fat. The creases were all bright red and stinky. I kept putting Balmex on the skin, and then Vaseline and cornstarch. None of that helped. It didn't dry the skin, didn't do anything. Lame.

Fortunately, after a few weeks, we were due for her 2-month appointment, so I was able to ask her pediatrician about the issue. The doctor said it was likely a fungal infection and recommended some kind of anti-fungal cream to treat it.

Well, guess how interested I was in buying an anti-fungal cream? Um, about 0%. I remembered that tea tree oil is supposed to be anti-fungal, so I came home and whipped something up.

My Awesome Natural Anti-Fungal Rub
1/4 cup coconut oil
1/2 tsp tea tree oil
1/4 tsp lavender oil
3 drops lemon oil

I don't remember why I added the lemon oil.

It's cold here, so I had to melt the coconut oil over a burner. Then I just mixed in the other ingredients and poured it into a container.

Totally worked.

I'm just using it as an all-over body lotion for her. Today it occurred to me that I'd read about cradle cap potentially being a fungal infection--apparently no one knows what cradle cap is or why babies get it? weird--so I think I'll try it on her cradle cap next.

Takeaway: I'm glad I had my essential oils on hand to treat my kid's fungal infection. It worked like a charm.

gave birth at home! and other fun stuff

I haven't updated here in forever.

Lots of stuff happened since I posted here--my younger sibs both got married, for example. My handicapped brother James passed away. And I gave birth in my living room.

So now we have two kids and we are crunchily raising both of them!

My brother's passing was--a blessing, mostly. For him and for all of us. The last few weeks leading up to his death were excruciating to behold. He just got sicker and sicker and sicker. Eventually it got to the point that he wouldn't hold any food down, so we decided to stop feeding him. I told my younger brother about our decision early in the day. By the time I got Sam's protestations over the decision via text, it was too late: James was already dead. We hadn't even had a chance to not-feed him.

I miss him, but kind of... more theoretically than practically, I guess you could say. I miss the essence of him, I guess. But I don't miss him in pain, or him struggling, or me struggling to care for him, or any of that.

My new baby is awesome. We named her Sarah and she is adorable. Almost 12 weeks now. She smiles, and has tons of dark hair and big blue eyes--slate blue, almost gray. Very pretty. She coos a LOT and has since she was just a few weeks old. We took her in at 4 weeks and she was already kicking and holding herself up really well, and cooing. Basically all the stuff you're not supposed to do until 8 weeks. She's my little baby smartie. Right now she's sleeping next to me in her new Swaddleme. She really loves being swaddled, apparently. Good times. We're in the living room, mere feet away from where she was born right next to my coffee table. I'm really glad I aimed for a homebirth--I would have had one anyway. I was in active labor for 10 minutes in the end. Very intense 10 minutes, I might add.

But the point is, I recently decided I should be more proactive in updating the world about our crunchy life. Some of it might come in handy.

One! Two!

Well, Nathaniel officially gets the concept of "two," as of today. This morning when he got up and went downstairs, he counted his steps all the way down: "One! Two! One! Two! One! Two!"

He counted his baby Crocs a bunch of times (there are two of them!).

He counted bugs.

He counted whatever he could find.

When he ate all his fruit snacks except for one, he held the one up and said, "MOMMY! ONE!!!" over and over again, elated to understand and articulate that he only had one fruit snack.

I'm pretty happy with him!

He's doing well with his pre-reading, too. He loves his Dr. Seuss ABC book (Big A, little a--what begins with A?), and he loves to point at all the letters and say their sounds. On every page, he points to the word BIG and says "B! I! G!" He really enjoys that.

He turns 2 in about three weeks. Pretty crazy!

attachment parenting 23 months in

Well! Nathaniel is now 23 months old. I figured it's a good time to check in with you all about our attachment parenting ways, since I haven't been that good at updating about them, and we have another kid on the way. Baby #2 is due in late August, so Carl and I have been talking about what we liked and didn't like about our parenting experiences so far.

Mostly, we've liked them.

As a reminder, there are Seven B's of attachment parenting: birth bonding, breastfeeding, babywearing, bedding close to baby, belief in language value of baby's cry, beware of baby trainers, and balance.

1. Birth Bonding. Did our best with that one, but that went horribly with Nathaniel because of my [unwanted] pitocin induction and epidural, and then the fact that he was so late and so big--he ended up in the NICU for the first day or so after birth. We will do better with this kid because I know now to really work hard at going into labor at 39 weeks (no more 43-week pregnancies, thanks), and we're having Kid #2 at home. So we will bond with this one.

2. Breastfeeding. I still nurse Nathaniel and I am not ashamed. He is allergic to lots of things, and nursing is one way I can be sure he's getting nutrients he needs even though his diet can be... uh, imbalanced due to his dietary restrictions. He only really nurses once or maaaaybe twice a day now--at night right before sleeping, and then before a nap if he bothers to take a nap these days. Mostly he is too busy for breastfeeding. On the pro side, I feel like nursing strengthens our relationship. On the other hand, I'm a little tired of my nursing wardrobe. It's not terrible, but I miss wearing other clothes. On the plus side, as a pregnant person, now it doesn't matter what I want to wear, because everything will be uncomfortable and look weird and I just have to deal with it for another three months. AUGUST!

3. Babywearing. Babywearing is AWESOME and I way recommend it. Nathaniel and I have always been very close--literally and emotionally. When he was just little little, I would wear him as I did my chores. I always wore him to the grocery store and on walks. And on airplanes--SO convenient on airplanes. Now that he's bigger and I'm pregnant, I don't wear him as much, but I still do a little bit. Well, not this month. But last month I did wear him! I fully plan to wear the second one a ton. It will be very convenient while I have to chase Nathaniel around to have both hands free and my little one right next to my body. Best babywearing tool: the ring sling. I got mine on Amazon for like $29.99. So worth it, so much better and more comfortable and convenient and cheaper than anything else I've tried.

4. Bedsharing. We still bedshare. My grandma was like, scandalized by it. And yeah, at this point, it's getting a little bit old. Nathaniel's getting big. But since we have been travelling and still have more travelling to do before the summer is over, we've decided not to move him to a toddler bed just yet. It would be bad to move him over and then have him sleep with us again while we're on the road, and have to have all the battles over again.

Bedsharing has been awesome for us. We've all slept very well, overall--I can count on two hands the times Nathaniel has woken us up with crying in the night. Every time it's been teething or illness, and we were right there to comfort him--no need to get out of bed. It's been amazingly convenient and very cuddly. Also it's been nice because a lot of times Carl doesn't get to see Nathaniel for more than an hour a day--but they can cuddle at night and it's nice. Also, Carl never lost sleep having to leave the room to bring me a screaming baby in the night. We will most likely bedshare with #2 as well. REMEMBER if you bedshare to follow all the rules for safe bedsharing. Look 'em up if you're interested.

5. Belief in language value of cries. I have always felt like Nathaniel's cries were important communication. Babies, at least as far as I can tell, don't cry because it's fun. They cry because they're scared, or tired, or lonely, or hurting, etc. All of those feelings are valid and crying is the only way a baby can express them. We have been very, very responsive to his cries and we do not let him cry it out. As a result, I believe, he's been a very chill dude, and he trusts us a lot. We will definitely work to be as responsive to #2 as we were to #1.

6. Beware of baby trainers. Eh, I was already doing this one. We'll keep being wary of baby training.

7. Balance. Been working on this one. I feel like life is pretty imbalanced right now, thanks to my pregnancy and travelling and weddings and Nathaniel's allergies and everything. Who knows. But we're trying. And we'll keep trying with the next one!

In other news, I'm excited to cloth diaper #2. Our cloth diapers have been fantastic and I way recommend them. They have saved us so much money. And now that Nathaniel's approaching potty-training age, he's really aware of everything going on down there, because cloth diapers are less comfortable than disposables. I think it will make potty training him a lot easier.

Anything else I'm missing? Anyway, attachment parenting isn't for everybody, but so far, it's been great for us.

Tuck.

Nathaniel has a NEW favorite word, and it is "Tuck." As in, "stuck." I never realized how many things are stuck in this world until my toddler started pointing out every single time anything is stuck.

He lets me know when he is properly buckled into his carseat: "Tuck! Tuck!"

He lets me know when his toys are stuck inside each other: "Tuck! Tuck!"

He likes to have me and Carl grab him and not let go: "Tuck! Tuck!"

His first sentence, if you can call it that, was "More tuck!" He wanted me to keep grabbing him over and over and not let him go.

He's a silly one!

Buck.

Nathaniel has a favorite word. Unfortunately, no one has any idea what it means.

The word is "buck." No, it does not mean "book." Here's how a typical buck-conversation goes:

Nathaniel, coming up to me and getting my attention: Buck.

Me: You want a book?

Nathaniel: *shakes head* Buck.

Me: You want to read a book?

Nathaniel: *shakes head, looks around the room for ideas of how to explain what he wants* Bu-u-u-u-ck. Buck. Buck. *with hand gestures*

Me: You want... to eat food?

[insert him saying "Buck" 25 times while I make random guesses and he shakes his head like I'm an idiot, over and over again]

Nathaniel: Buck! Buck!

Me: You... want to go to Mamie's house?

Nathaniel: *nods like I'm the stupidest person he knows and why did it take me so long, anyway??*

~~

Unfortunately, it doesn't always mean "take me to Mamie's house." This morning he came down for breakfast, and sat in his seat, and pointed out the door saying "Buck! Buck!" Who knows??

Two days ago, my sister and her fiance took Nathaniel out on a walk. As it turned out, the fiance was wearing a shirt with an actual buck on it--like a male deer. They were teaching Nathaniel words as they walked, and they pointed to Elliot's shirt and said, "Buck!"

And he got SO excited--"Buck! Buck!"

But I'm pretty sure that's not what he means when he says the word.